My brother likes to joke about how many people my mother could feed with a single package of deli meat. Sandwiches might have been thin, but everyone ate. If there is a single word to sum up my mother, I think it would be hospitality. She was adept at throwing parties for all manner of social occasions and events, including a notable affair honoring Leonard Bernstein when he visited Denver. She also looked after the motley array of friends and acquaintances my siblings and I brought home, whipping up lunches on short notice with whatever happened to be in the fridge. At her funeral, most of the stories people recalled about her involved the way she made them feel in our home.
If service and caring are what we do as Christians, hospitality is how we do it. Well-planned liturgies complete with lilting music and brilliant preaching, won’t last much past the final “amen” if those in attendance don’t feel welcome. No wonder that Jesus spoke so often about the importance of banquets and celebrations including not only the rich and powerful, but also “…the poor, the crippled, the lame, the blind…” (Luke 14:13). Everyone has a place at the table no matter what their physical, mental, emotional, or social state or status.
Sad to say, our society these days seems to be setting tables in exclusive fashion. We gravitate towards those with like-minded views about politics and hot-button issues. Those who are poor or unemployed are often blamed for their circumstances and categorized as lazy or lacking ambition. Immigrants are resented for encroaching on our territory. In his encyclical, Evangelii Gaudium, Pope Francis cautions against Christians “warring against ourselves” and stoking a “spirit of exclusivity” by creating “inner circles” (98). Hospitality is a counter to all of these attitudes. Derived from the Latin word hospitalitas, which in turn comes from hospes or guest, it means to welcome another as guest. In Christian terms this means seeing Christ in each person.
No one who entered our front door had to pass a litmus test of political correctness or spiritual worthiness. My mother fed them all. She was a consummate “Martha” – a woman on the go who multi-tasked long before it became a cultural virtue. That never precluded her from being a gracious hostess and warm presence in the lives of those who knew her. Esther de Waal poses two vital questions around hospitality as part of the Rule of Saint Benedict: Do we see Christ in others? Do they see Christ in us? I think my mother passed on both counts.
Bright Ideas
Assess the hospitality level in your class or home. How is each person welcomed as one would welcome Christ?
Learn more about Saint Benedict and the Rule he established for Benedictine communities.
Download my Prayer for Hospitality, and use it in your parish or home.